ב"ה

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Where Is My Ice Cream?

Thursday, July 25, 2024 - 11:39 AM

Last week, I drove my kids into the city. It was just me and six of them in the car. No wife with me.

They all climbed inside and I turned on the music for a nice, uneventful ride.

Well, the uneventful part was short-lived, to say the least. All of three minutes in, one of the triplets, Avigayil, started screaming and crying.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” I asked.

She didn’t answer, so I asked her triplet brothers.

“Yehuda pinched her,” Dovid said, explaining that she moved a couple of inches too close to him.

My options for dealing with the situation while driving were limited. Normally, when Shevy is with me, I drive and she deals with their fights. But here I was alone.

So I asked the older girls sitting in the middle row if I could move Avigayil up with them, so she wouldn’t be near her brothers. Unfortunately, they adamantly refused.

Oi gevalt! What now?

So I resorted to my next best option: bribery.

“Look, there’s a gas station about halfway there that sells kosher, chalav yisrael ice cream,” I told Yehuda. “There are only a handful like it in the whole country! If you behave and don’t pinch anyone else, I’ll buy you ice cream when we get there.”

He didn’t answer, but I saw he was listening and I know he loves ice cream. Surely, this would do the trick.

Feeling proud of myself, I continued driving. Avigayil had calmed down. Music was blaring. I breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m so good at this, I can do this,” I told myself.

Not 30 seconds later, Avigayil was again crying hysterically.

“What happened this time?”

“Yehuda pinched her and pulled her hair.”

Now what was I to do? I really needed my wife!

So I said, “Yehuda, look, I’ll give you one more chance. If you don’t pull anyone’s hair or pinch anyone, I’ll buy everyone ice cream. I know you all love ice cream! But this is your last chance. One more step out of line and nobody gets ice cream.

Avigayil calmed down and I breathed a sigh of relief. Baruch Hashem, thank you G-d!

Not 25 seconds passed before Avigayil was crying hysterically again. According to Dovid, Yehuda pinched her again and very hard!

That’s it! I pulled off the highway onto the shoulder meant for emergencies. This is definitely an emergency! I brought Avigayil to sit in the middle row with her sisters, away from the boys. That’s it. No more fighting, no more pinching. Out of arm’s reach.

And we continued on our way. This time, thank G-d, all was peaceful.

About 10 minutes from Manhattan, Yehuda pipes up, “Where is my ice cream?”

I was incredulous! I looked at them, all playing and chatting so nicely together, even him and Avigayil—no remnants of the pinches, hair pulling or screaming. Nada. As if nothing had ever happened, they were best friends all along, and he wants his ice cream!

How could it be? Half an hour ago they were ready to kill each other! Apparently, it had completely slipped his mind at this point!

I shook my head and realized what an incredible lesson there is for all of us to see here.

Children choose being happy over being right. Adults choose being right over being happy. Children can easily forget about their fights because they choose to be happy.

We are currently in the Three Weeks leading up to the destruction of the Holy Temple due to our infighting and hatred for each other. But imagine if we were more like kids. They fight, and then they’re OK. Five minutes later the fight is over and they want their ice cream.

What we need more than anything else in today's day and age is to learn from our children. Let the fights be forgiven and forgotten. We are all brothers and sisters. So what if we have disagreements? In this world, which is so divisive, we must learn to love one another.

Let's choose to be happy over being right. And in doing so, we will end the exile and bring about the rebuilding of the Beit Hamikdash—the third and final Holy Temple.

My dear Zalman

Thursday, July 18, 2024 - 8:20 PM

My dear Zalman,

As we celebrate your bar mitzvah this week, I find myself overwhelmed with emotion.

The past 13 years have flown by; I vividly remember your bris like it was yesterday. Watching you grow into the remarkable young man you are today has been an incredible journey. We are so thankful to Hashem for entrusting us with your precious neshama to nurture and to love!

As you transition into adulthood and take on the responsibilities of the 613 mitzvot, I want to prepare you: From now on, a constant battle will rage within you—a battle between the forces of evil and the forces of light. Every moment, every day, you will face a choice: Will your eyes read the latest world gossip, or will they be fixed on the pages of the eternal Torah? Will your mouth be used to slander or to talk kindly about others? Will your hands be used to hurt or to wrap tefillin? Will your legs carry you to inflict pain or to a hospital to visit the sick?

You are now part of the “struggling brigade,” like the rest of us. But here's an important truth: G-d has equipped you with the resources to overcome and emerge victorious in this battle! The power to triumph lies within you. You cannot blame your friends, your teachers or even your parents. The power is given to you and only you. You alone can tap into that innate strength to overcome any obstacle in your path.

We live in a world plagued by darkness, devoid of spirituality, filled with chaos. So many bad people, so many unnecessary wars. But amidst this darkness, you have a mission—a purpose that sets you apart. Your job is to find and ignite the light and illuminate a world desperately in need of hope and healing. It’s up to you to show the world that there is a Master to this universe—the Almighty G-d.

As you embark on this new chapter of adulthood, remember that the forces of light will always overcome the forces of darkness. The smallest flame can light up the darkest room; even a small spark of spirituality can dispel the darkness around us. You just have to strike the match.

You are now fully responsible for all your Torah and mitzvot. I am thrilled that you can now help us form a minyan in shul every week! I urge you to embrace this responsibility and become a shining example of light in a world that sorely needs it.

Ever since you were born, I’ve seen the fire inside you—the burning sensation to do and live and go. You are a man on a mission. You have been given incredible natural gifts. You love helping people and you have natural charisma and charm. Take these talents with you and use them to transform the world!

May you fulfill your mission and become a beacon of hope in these unprecedented times.

Tatty

Wounded Warrior Pays it Forward

Thursday, July 11, 2024 - 6:17 PM

Ten years ago, a young soldier’s life changed forever in Gaza. Itai* was serving in the special forces Golani brigade during Operation Protective Edge in 2014. When his unit entered Gaza, they were bombed by terrorists, leaving Itai severely wounded, his body riddled with shrapnel.

He spent the next few months in rehabilitation, unsure if he’d ever recover, with no idea where his life was headed. Those hospital days were dark and pain-filled, but against all odds, Itai preserved and prevailed.

On his journey toward recovery, Belev Echad was with him every step of the way. I met Itai when he came on one of our restorative trips to NYC soon after his injury, enjoying 10 incredible days with our community. Itai loved all the luxuries and experiences we provided and bonded with our community in a deep and meaningful way.

He subsequently became such an integral part of Belev Echad, that I even had the honor and privilege of officiating at his wedding. It was during one of the busiest weeks of my life, but I felt strongly that I wanted to be there. I flew in, officiated and attended his beautiful chuppah and reception, and flew back a short few hours later. I was so happy to be there.

This week, I received an emotional call from Itai, now an alumnus of our program. He shared that it's been exactly 10 years since his injury and he wants to give back. Thank G-d, at this point, he is in an amazing place with a stable job and a family. He generously donated $1,800 to pay it forward to help other wounded soldiers. I told him we would allocate his donation to our food program. Every month we provide wounded soldiers with food packages so that they will have food in their homes and their fridges.

I was deeply moved by his gesture. It was a full-circle moment. Here is a soldier, wounded in battle, who received so much from Belev Echad and now he is giving back!

Could Itai have ever imagined, during those grueling days of rehab 10 years ago, that he would one day become a philanthropist for the very same organization? Imagine if he could have seen the light at the end of the tunnel during his darkest days!

Right now, there are 14,000 newly injured soldiers from the current war. If we could give them a lesson of inspiration from Itai, it would be: Look! There is hope at the end of the tunnel. This can be you one day, as long as you don’t give up.

The rest of us can learn from Itai too. Not a single human in this world goes through life without challenges. We all face obstacles and trials and tribulations. But, like Itai, there is a light at the end of the tunnel for us too—just believe in it and you will get there!

In fact, right now as Jews we are in exile—the darkest moments of exile—but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. We know that Moshiach’s arrival and the Final Redemption is imminent. It will happen at any moment—as long as we stay focused on the goal and don’t give up hope.

A little bit of Itai’s perseverance will stand us all in good stead. Yashar Koach, Itai!

*Name changed to protect privacy

30 Years!

Thursday, July 4, 2024 - 4:45 PM

Every day I wake up, replete with energy, ready to bound into the day and inspire my fellow Jews and make a positive impact on the world.

And indeed, my wife and I have been able to open and run a Chabad center with a successful preschool program whose graduates now live all over the world. We’ve been privileged to reach and inspire thousands of people through our Hebrew school, day camp, shul, adult education classes, programs and events. We’ve been able to hire 70 employees and provide them with a livelihood. And of course, we have our unique Belev Echad organization, through which we’ve been blessed to restore life and meaning to countless wounded IDF soldiers.

Believe it or not, there are 6,500 families of Chabad shluchim worldwide just like us, operating over 3,500 associations across 110 countries—numbers which continue to grow weekly.

Chabad is in every corner of the world, servicing school children, teenagers, college kids, young professionals, new parents, adults, seniors, and every other demographic you can think of. There is no other organization like it in the world. We are an army, and we all wake up every morning with the same energy, inspired by the mission and vision of the Chabad movement.

What is the secret? How does it work?

The Rebbe

It's been exactly 30 years since our Rebbe left the world. On the 3rd of Tammuz, 1994, the Rebbe left this physical world after a prolonged illness, but his reach and his teachings continue to motivate and inspire all of us daily.

In the coming days, as we mark the 30-year anniversary of the Rebbe’s passing, tens of thousands of people will go to visit his Ohel in Queens to pray. Some of these will be shluchim like me. Many will be members of Chabad communities and Chabad houses. Some will be there for the first time. Some will be regulars. Some will be secular. Others will be non-Jewish. There will be families, individuals, camps, communities. And then there will be some people who no one knows, who have no apparent connection to Chabad, but who have somehow, sometime, somewhere been touched by the Rebbe’s far-reaching network.

The Rebbe inspired people like no one else in history. Thirty years after his passing, I wake up every morning and study his teachings. It’s part of my life. It’s what makes me tick. It’s the source of my inspiration.

His teachings encompass thousands of pages and tens of thousands of hours of classes and recordings—there’s no way I can even begin to encapsulate all that here, but if I had to pick out three lessons that inspire me the most, here they are:

The Rebbe taught us to believe in ourselves. No matter what challenge or obstacle you are facing, you can persevere and overcome. Whether it’s difficulty procuring a livelihood, or because you’re lonely, or are experiencing marital problems—nothing is too big or too bad. You can prevail and succeed! The Rebbe taught that each of us can change the world. Yes me, small little me, can literally change the universe with my actions. Just do one more act of goodness and kindness today and you will change the entire world

The Rebbe taught us to believe in people. The Rebbe taught us to see only the good inside of every Jew—that no matter how rough people may look on the outside, to love them and judge them favorably, because every Jew is a diamond with a G-dly core. If you can’t find the jewel hidden behind the layers, it just means you need to dig deeper.

The Rebbe taught us to believe in the world. The Rebbe taught us that no matter how bad the situation appears, ultimately it will be good. If it’s not good, then it’s not the end yet!

When we look at the war currently raging in Israel and we see how virulently our enemies hate us, and just how many enemies we have—Hamas, Hezbollah, Iran, ISIS, etc—it’s easy to feel fearful and despondent. In fact, it’s only natural.

But the Rebbe taught us otherwise. G-d has a plan and we have to have faith in that plan. If we don’t see the good, it’s still coming. In fact, the Rebbe repeatedly taught that Israel is actually the safest place in the world. It’s where, as Scripture promises, “The eyes of G-d are upon the land from the beginning of the year until the end.”

We are facing the highest rates of antisemitism in almost 100 years. Of course we feel despondent! But the Rebbe told us to hold on tight. The darkest part of the night is just before dawn breaks, and that is where we are right now. The world is in chaos, our brothers and sisters in Israel and across the world are under attack; if ever there was a sign that the dawn—the Final Redemption—is about to materialize, this is it.

The light is shining brightly at the end of the tunnel and we know Hashem will never let us down. Learning and internalizing the Rebbe’s teachings will help us develop the trust and belief we need for the dawn to break through, and Moshiach to arrive, may it happen speedily!

Rabbi Uriel Vigler

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