“Who is "Chava Weiss Sale?” our bookkeeper texted me a few months ago. “There are payments to that name coming out of our account.”
I stopped in my tracks, racking my brain. The name sounded totally unfamiliar, and when I asked around, no one else on the team recognized it either.
The first charge, in March, was small. Just $350. But then came a bigger one in May for $8,012.50.
Now I was worried. Something wasn’t right.
We immediately got to work making dozens of phone calls, cross-checking invoices, and scanning our records, but we couldn’t find any connection.
Then came another charge in July, for $2,940. I was now on high alert.
I called the bank and was strongly advised to close our account and open a new one. They explained that today’s scammers are so sophisticated that there’s really no other option but to close the account and dispute the charges.
But the payments were transferred via Intuit’s ACH system, which meant somehow, they had access to our routing and account numbers—information we only hand out very carefully.
I asked the bank how in the world anyone would get access to those numbers, and all they could tell me was that thieves and scammers are bold and use extremely advanced techniques.
I hesitated to close the account because that would disrupt donations from important partners like Fidelity and the Jewish Community Fund, and the many other donors who generously contribute to our causes.
I knew we couldn’t ignore this, but I wasn’t quite ready to give up and close the account.
We kept searching, reaching out to every staff member and every vendor. Still no clarity.
Then, just as we were about to give up and sign the dispute forms, we had a breakthrough! One of our staff recognized the amounts and realized that they precisely matched payments owed to one of our regular vendors. It was just the name that was different.
A quick phone call revealed the mystery: They had changed their business name on the receipts without telling us.
Whew. Relief. And just in the nick of time.
As I told and retold this story, I realized this was not an isolated incident.
Don’t we all do this?
We see someone acting in a way we don’t understand. We don’t recognize their behavior. Something feels off and we’re quick to jump to conclusions.
“Must be fraud! What else could it be?”
“They must be cheating, nothing else makes sense.”
“What benefit of the doubt? That was definitely malicious! ”
“Quick, cut them off. Cancel them. Protect yourself.”
In fact this week one of our team members in Israel called and texted a lapsed donor asking him to meet for coffee. He suspected that she was an Iranian agent and sent her a really nasty message ending off with "Go have your coffee in Iran."
But what if we’re wrong? We only see one small snippet of behavior. What about the story, context, or struggle we haven’t taken the time to understand?
This past Sunday, Tisha B’av, we marked the destruction of both Holy Temples in Jerusalem. The Second Temple was destroyed because of “sinat chinam,” baseless hatred between Jews.
What is baseless hatred?
It’s when we see “Chava Weiss Sale” and shout “fraud!”
It’s when we see a fellow Jew acting in a way we don’t understand, and instead of asking for clarification, we jump in and accuse.
It’s when we cut someone off instead of giving them the benefit of the doubt.
It may be human nature, but it’s one need to fight against.
Sometimes a person who seems so wrong, so “off,” is just showing up under a name you don’t recognize.
Give them a chance. Make the call. Seek understanding. That’s Ahavat Yisrael, unconditional love, and that’s what will rebuild the Temple.
We’re still paying the price for our rush to judgment back then, still awaiting the rebuilding of the Temple and the Final Redemption.
So instead of just mourning the destruction—let’s fix what caused it. Judge less; love more.
Because Redemption won’t come through anger. It will come through compassion.