Spitting at an 8 year old girl

This past Shabbat morning, my kids were playing together. Suddenly, in the middle of their game, my five year old daughter got upset at my three year old son and she literally attacked him. She flew into a rage, totally lost control of herself, and started hurting her little brother. Luckily, I was present and I quickly put her in timeout before any serious damage was done. A mere half hour later, I took both kids to shul with me and lo and behold, I saw them playing together happily as if they were eternal best friends. I thought to myself who are my children truthfully? The ones fighting with each other, or the ones who are best friends? What do they really feel for each other? Hate or love? Animosity or friendship?

I have been listening to the news in Israel the last couple of days and my heart is in pain. There is no excuse whatsoever for a “charedi” man to spit at an 8 year old girl. It is totally and utterly shameful. There is no excuse whatsoever for a “charedi” to call a female soldier a “whore.” This has absolutely no place in our society. There is no excuse whatsoever for a “charedi” to wear holocaust garb and a yellow star. There is also no excuse whatsoever for the hate and animosity being spewed from the “secular” side of the argument. The poisonous venom that is being spread palpably across Israel and the entire Jewish world is totally and utterly unacceptable.

Israel seems to be torn apart by hate and violence, and my heart is aching. But there is another scene that I cannot forget: October 18, 2011, the day Gilad Schalit came home. The unity that prevailed then was indescribable. For one day there were no more “charedim” or “chilonim,” “settlers” or “leftists.” There were no more barriers, no more labels, and no more political parties. For one day we stood as a nation - as one family. As siblings, as one family. Yes, people argued about the heavy price paid for his release, but as Gilad embraced his father Noam, every heart melted, and every eye shed a tear.

So I ask myself – who is the true nation of Israel? Is it the nation that stands divided? Fighting? Arguing? Demonizing each other? Committing vile and offensive actions? Or is it the nation that shows such a deep love and compassion for just one soldier? The nation that ultimately stands together through thick and through thin? The nation that shares loves, hopes, and dreams?

Deep down inside, every single one of us already knows the truth. The “quintessential Israeli moment” was the moment of love, of unity, of oneness. That is when “Am Yisrael Chai,” and we reached our deepest core. The peak of Jewish greatness is when we feel for each other, celebrate, and even cry together. This is the heart of the Jewish nation, and the heart of Israel. The nation that is tearing each other apart before the eyes of the entire world is not. It is time to embrace our true selves.

The disciples of Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi asked their master: "Which is the greater virtue, love of G-d or love of one's fellow?" Rabbi Schneur Zalman replied: “True love means that you love that which your loved one loves. G-d loves every single one of His children. So ultimately, the two loves are one and the same, and when one truly loves G-d, s/he loves with equal intensity every single fellow Jew.”

We are currently in the week that we fast and mourn for the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. The Temple was destroyed due to a lack of love, to senseless hatred. It is time to fix this mistake – it is time to reveal the true unity and love that Am Yisrael is capable of. It is time to reach across divides and differences, and care about each other simply as brethren, and as family. We may not always agree, but we always must remember and feel that we share an inner bond that is unbreakable, and that our foundation forever is a shared love of G-d and shared love for each other.

My thanks to Avi Shlomo for editing this article