A student of the Alter Rebbe (the first Chabad Rebbe) once spent close to half an hour complaining to his Rebbe about all the things he felt his life lacked. "I need money to pay the rent, money to marry off my daughters, money to buy my wife clothing..." and that was just the tip of the iceberg. He continued to tearfully list his needs, one after the next.
The Alter Rebbe looked at him sharply. "For half an hour you're crying about what you need, but you haven't once mentioned what you're needed for!"
As a Rabbi, I often find myself on the receiving end of people's needs - and their complaints.
"Rabbi, I need a document signed, can you help me?" (from a guy who hasn't answered any of my texts, calls or emails in several years...)
"Rabbi, there's no soda at this kiddush! Why isn't there soda?" (despite the beautiful, catered meal of salads, cholent and meat...)
"Rabbi, the cholent's too spicy. Rabbi, the cholent is tasteless. Rabbi, where are the salads?"
Such is the life of a Rabbi. Even Moses struggled as a leader, with the Jewish nation complaining about his every move.
And it's a hard job. It doesn't start at 9am, nor end at 5pm. A Rabbi needs to be available virtually 24/7 for counseling, burials, marriages, divorces, circumcisions, bar mitzvahs, torah classes and synagogue services... not to mention fundraising and balancing an entire budget!
But this week, I was reminded why I do what I do, and what it's all about.
At the annual Chabad convention in Brooklyn, I found myself among 5000 Chabad rabbis from all corners of the world. We had representatives from Azerbaijan, Cyprus, Guatemala, Laos, Slovakia, Tunisia and dozens of other countries, not to mention 47 states across the USA.
The convention culminates in the grand banquet - where all 5000 rabbis and some of their supporters gather for an evening of unity and inspiration. At my table alone we had rabbis from Thailand, California, Florida, Israel and Brazil.
The highlight of the banquet is the "roll call," which is when Rabbi Moshe Kotlarsky, director of the International Conference of Chabad-Lubavitch Emissaries and vice chairman of Merkos L’Inyonei Chinuch, Chabad-Lubavitch’s educational arm, lists all the countries represented in the room, and everyone breaks into spontaneous dance.
While I was dancing, with 5000 of my contemporaries, there came a moment where I forgot about myself. I got lost in the dancing, oblivious to my surroundings. And suddenly I realized, it's not about me, or my needs. It's about what I'm needed for. What can I contribute to society? Not, what can I take from society.
There, in that room with 5000 other Rabbis, all of whom are dedicated to the same cause I am - spreading the light of Torah and mitzvot, and permeating the world with the joy and passion of judaism - I realized that I wouldn't change my life for anything in the world. Not a thing. I am an emissary of the Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson.
Perhaps this is a message for all of us. Instead of focusing on our own needs and desires, let's try to focus more on what we can do for others. Surely, with practice, it will become second nature.