On August 7, 2010, I received a phone call from Steven* who I knew pretty well.
"Rabbi, what are your plans for Shabbat?" he asked.
Well, it was one of the hottest weeks of the summer and we hadn't been away at all. We'd worked all year and run camp all summer and we were looking forward to going away to Upstate New York to spend Shabbat with family.
But then Steven asked, "Can I invite myself for Shabbat dinner?"
I thought for a minute and said, "Yes, ok."
Then he added, "Well, can I invite my cousin as well? And my parents and my uncles and my friends..." And before I knew it 20 people were included in the invitation!
Steve explained that his cousin just got married and they needed a place to host sheva brachot on Friday night. I was a bit taken aback, but agreed to host the event.
So my wife cooked a beautiful meal for 20 of Steven's guests and we really hit it off with the young couple. We not only hosted them for Friday night, but we also did a sheva brachot for them on Shabbat day in our shul.
Well, when you do a mitzvah G-d always rewards you. Not always immediately and not always in a clear way. But He does.
In this case, it quickly became clear. The young couple became regular shul goers and ended up volunteering tens, if not hundreds, of hours at many of our events and programs.
Over the years our relationship with Steven has grown and strengthened, and he has become a strong supporter of ours. This year when he attended our Belev Echad program, and saw first-hand the wounded soldiers that we are helping, he felt tremendously proud to have sponsored one of the soldiers. It is the best thing he's done since landing in New York, he said.
Often, when we think we're doing a favor for another, in truth the other person is helping us. The other person is allowing you to a mitzvah, and while it may seem like you are the giver, you are really the receiver. At the time, making that sheva brachot felt like doing Steven a huge favor, but the favors he and his cousins have done for us since then far outweigh our sheva brachot meal!
Our community just finished hosting 10 severely wounded IDF soldiers. And while we think we were the givers - giving them 10 days to forget about their pain and worries, truthfully they gave us so much more. They gave us the opportunity to learn from their strength and resilience. They are truly the cream of the IDF crop - men of remarkable spirit and fortitude, and the time we spent with them made us better people.
We are gearing up for the holiday of Shavuot, when the Jewish people camped at Mount Sinai "Like one man with one heart." They were so united, it was as if they shared a single mind, body and soul. As they prepared to receive the Torah, the differences between them melted away completely.
We, too, at our core, love each other the way the Jews at Sinai loved one another - without restriction or petty details.
By going out of our way to do favors for one another, we can rekindle that unity and bring it to the surface once more, as we prepare to re-receive the Torah on Shavuot.
*Names have been changed to protect privacy.